Forever
by kissandmakeupgrl
Summary: I swore to marry my Jacob when I was physically five years old. If only I could tell Jacob himself about our engagement...  Sometimes I have trouble expressing herself. Being in love with a thick-headed werewolf just makes this habit even more troubling.
1. Pride is Hard to Swallow

**Author's Note: This is my first story and I'm really pumped! I hope everyone enjoys this first chapter- although it's a bit short. If you have any questions or comments feel free to leave me a message!**

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He chased me down the beach. The sun shined and my skin glowed. Literally. Those who shared my special eyesight could see the faint glimmers of light bouncing off of my body. He bent over and splashed me with the water that dances along the shoreline. I squealed like a little girl and ran faster. By now, you must be wondering who "He" is. To people who know me, it's completely obvious who "He" is. "He" is the only boy in the world. "He" is Jacob. "I" am Renesmee Cullen, a.k.a. Nessie, as in "Loch Ness Monster". Don't let the nickname fool you though- I'm an angel.

"Get ready for the beating of a lifetime!" Jacob exclaimed. I screamed and ran in the opposite direction- which happened to be up the dock leading to the ocean. Damn. There was only one thing left to do.

"Stop! I surrender!" I said, putting my hands up like a criminal caught by the authorities. Jacob raised a skeptical eyebrow.

"I don't trust you…"

"I'm not lying," I pleaded, " Pinky swear?" I stuck my right pinky out and he reluctantly hooked his pinky with mine. I ignored the electric shocks that ricocheted though my body and twisted my right hand around to grab hold of his. Then I used my left hand to grab hold of his upper arm and flipped him off the dock and into the ocean. The move was so quick that normal humans wouldn't have been able to see it. Jacob and I aren't normal, though.

"Nessie!" Jacob screamed with a vengeance.

"Yes?" I answered, in my sugar-sweet voice.

"You're so gonna pay for that."

"It's your fault. Next time I steal your SloppyJoe, grab another instead of chasing me down the beach or else you'll end up getting wet. Now come on. You smell like a wet dog." I said, stretching out my hand and helping him back onto the dock. He didn't really smell like a wet dog. To be truthful, Jake smelled like almonds drizzled in chocolate. Everybody says that he actually smells like earth- or a dog, depending on who's telling me. But, everybody's wrong. Jake smells sweet and rich. Jake smells delicious. Mouth-watering.

"…wanna bite into it."

"What?"

"I can smell that new steakhouse from here. The ribs smell so good that I wanna bite into 'em."

"Wanna go?" I asked excitedly.

"You just ate, Nessie."

"And your point is?"

"Alright, let's go." Jake sighed.

"Yes!"

We were seated by a guy named Rico Fernandez. I guess he was kinda cute, but I was too busy debating the best way to cook meat with Jake to notice. I think meat is best extra-rare while Jake thinks it's better well-done.

"Can I take you order?" Asked our waitress. She looked about sixty and had a smoker's voice along with bright red hair. She was chewing on a stick of gum and standing with her hip cocked to the side.

"I'd like to start us out with two apple-juices and a basket of curly-fries, please."

"Orders for her man. I like that in a girl." The waitress said, writing down our order. She went to fill our order and I was left pondering the idea of Jake being "my man", I mean, Jake is undeniably mine, but not "my man"…. Yet.

"So, is it me or does that waitress's hair look totally fake?"

"I know, right! How could she be that old and her hair be that red?" I enthused. We went on about completely random stuff until our food came. I slurped down my apple-juice, even though I knew that juice refills were fifty-nine cents extra. Let's just say that my family could cover it. Jake stared at me with a look of pure wonder.

"A creature of the night who drinks apple-juice. What has the world come to?"

"That's half creature of the night, to you. Now, shut up and drink your juice, Wolfie." I growled.

"Yes, ma'am." He tossed the straw out of the cup and chugged all of the drink down- including the ice cubes.

"Show-off." I muttered.

"The greatest." Jake smiled. I smiled back. Seriously, Jake could say that I'm the ugliest person on Earth and I'd smile like an idiot as long as he was smiling while he said it. I am truly stupid.

"You wanna split a platter?" I asked.

"No way. I get my own platter."

"The platters here are enough to feed eight people, Jake."

"And your point is?"

"Alright, get your own." I sighed.

"Yes!" Somehow, this conversation felt familiar.

"You ready to order, kids?" The fake-haired waitress asked. Her name tag read "Betty". Suiting.

"We'd like a deluxe meat platter, a steak extra-rare, and two apple-juice refills." I handed in Jake and I's menus after ordering. Betty wrote down our orders and sauntered off with the menus.

"I was finally old enough order beer last year and you've got me drinking damned _apple-juice_." Jake muttered darkly.

"I'll ask her to put some foam on top of yours and it'll practically be the same thing."

"No, it won't." Jake whined.

"What's so great about beer, anyways?" I asked, getting annoyed.

"The fact that I can finally drink it legally. Not everybody grows up as fast as you do, Ness." I glowered.

"You of all people shouldn't be talking at me about growing up fast, Jake. You've probably looked twenty-one since you were sixteen."

"But I wasn't, in all actuality, twenty-one. Therefore, I couldn't drink with a clear conscience."

"That's like saying I'm not seventeen because, in all actuality, I'm five and a half. Besides, since when have you had any sort of conscience?"

"That was low, Ness."

"Low, but still true."

"I guess you're right, Ness. I don't have a conscience." Jake smiled.

"What makes you say that?" I asked.

"Because, Ness, if I had a conscience I wouldn't want to…" Jake leaned in so close that his face was nearly touching me. My breathing accelerated and then stopped altogether.

"You wouldn't want to…" I prodded.

"I wouldn't want to… strangle you in the middle of the restaurant." He said, then sat back laughing.

"Ugh." I groaned, then pushed away from the table. I turned away from the asshole that is Jake.

"Um, Ness? What's wrong?" Jake was suddenly concerned. Asshole.

"Your food's almost done, kids." Betty said. I gave her my most winning smile.

"I'm sorry for the inconvenience, but can you make the steak to-go, please?"

"What about the platter, honey?"

"Oh, you can leave that here." Betty nodded and walked away.

"Ness…" Jake reached across the table for my elbow. I jerked away from him.

"Here's your stuff, hon." Betty said, handing me my boxed steak. I handed her a random dollar bill. I hoped it was enough.

"Keep the change." Betty gasped. Must've been a hundred…

I dashed out of the restaurant and into the nearest forest. Then went into hyper-speed. Okay, I might be losing some of you, so I'm going to explain everything. To those who know everything, please try to bear the boring recap. I'm a super-natural hybrid, like the dude in Underworld. There are only three difference between us: First, I was born this way, not "created". Second, I'm part vampire and part human, not werewolf. Third, I don't turn blue.

My mom conceived, carried, and gave birth to me while human. My dad was a vampire and, um, helped her with the conceiving part. Thus, I was born, part human like my mom, and part vampire like my dad. My mom nearly died while giving birth, but my dad changed her at the last moment and everything's fine now. You'd think it's weird having parents that looked your age and, at times, younger than you, but… wait. It is weird. Never mind that thought.

Jake, the asshole, is a werewolf, or rather, a shapeshifter that take the form of a wolf. A ripped, dangerous wolf that stands at over five and a half feet on all fours. He and a select group of natives on La Push share this trait. The wolf trait, not the asshole trait. Although, Leah does have her moments…

I ate my steak alone in the dark woods. It was actually pretty good. I got up and ran home.

"What's with the mood, Nessie?" Jasper asked. Okay, here's the thing. Some vampires bring traits they have with them as humans to their vampire lives. Only intensified. Sometimes the traits become so strong that they become these really cool ( and some times annoying ) powers. Jasper's trait-power-thing is dealing with emotions. He can sense and control what people are feeling. So of course he'd know I was majorly pissed right now.

"It's just a fight with an asshole. Don't worry… Actually, can you make me feel better?"

"Nobody really asks me that much."

"Everyone should ask you to do that. Imagine it: You're having a bad day and you go to your old pal, Jasper. Bibbity-bobbity-boo! You feel better! The end."

"Cute."

"Seriously! You should work as a therapist! You make everyone feel better!"

"Only as long as they were in the building."

"All the more reason for them to come more often. You'd be rich!"

"You're truly evil. Besides, I think our little family has enough change in our pockets." We smiled. That was totally true.

"Thanks Jasper. Just talking is making me feel better." I said happily. Jasper gave me a smile that made me feel less confident that it was only talking that made me feel better.

"Jasper…"

"I helped a _little bit_." And with a smile, Jasper left the house. Probably to hunt. Damn vampires.

"Hey, Nessie. I was about to take a plane to New York for some shopping. You wanna come with me?" Aunt Alice asked. Finally. Some solace in the midst of troubles.

"Don't you usually have your stuff delivered?"

"Yeah, but I saw that you'd wanna leave today, so I booked us plane tickets." Thank God for Alice. As you can see, some vampire gifts are miracles given to us by Heaven. Alice can see into the future, but only as long as someone keeps a straight head. If someone changes their mind, the vision changes. Get it?

"Thanks. How long are we staying?"

"Three days. I also booked us a hotel." Three days away from Asshole… Surprisingly, the thought brought a little sting along with the relief. I'm truly sick and twisted.

"Okay, Alice. Let's go."

Alice and I drove to Seattle to catch our plane. The plane, of course, was first class and really nice. Complimentary silk throw pillows were already sitting on our seats when we got on. During the six and a half hour flight, Alice and I looked through catalogs for the hottest clothes to look for, arranged manicure appointments, and even found a place for me to eat.

Alice and I got off the plane and immediately started shopping. We hadn't bothered to bring any clothes since we knew we'd buy plenty while we were here. I can't exactly say that we shopped 'til we dropped, because vampires don't really "drop". What I can say is that we shopped 'til the rumbling of my stomach started to annoy Alice. We then proceeded to drop our new stuff off at the hotel and then went to our restaurant. The doorman's face when we walked in with all our bags was comical. He was either new to his job or we were an extra-special case. The restaurant was really good. The bill made even my eyes widen, but I guess I ate a little more than the average customer. Still, Alice ( being a vampire ) didn't eat at all, so it should've balanced out. When got back to our hotel, I took the time to look around. It was gorgeous. The floors were made of marble, the alabaster ceiling hung high over our heads, and splashes of color gave the place warmth. My glass house was prettier, though.

After putting everything away, I called my parents with the hotel phone.

"Hello? Bella Cullen speaking."

"Hey mom! Alice and I just got back to our hotel. How're you doing?"

"We'd be doing _fine_ if that damned dog would stop calling the freaking house." Rosalie half-yelled into the phone.

"Nice to hear from you, Rosalie."

"Don't worry, honey. It isn't _your_ fault. It's the mutt's fault. Maybe we should move to Greenland and get rid of him once and for all. Yeah! We'll get new names and-" There was the sound of the phone being wrestled away and then mom was back on.

"Um, honey? Why didn't you tell Jake where you were going?"

"I…"

"What?"

"I wasn't with him earlier and I forgot my phone."

"Why weren't you with him earlier?"

"Because Jake was being an asshole."

"You didn't try to call Jake because the two of you got into a little fight?"

"No." I muttered.

"_Renesmee Cullen_. You'd better call Jake right now. Do you know how worried he is?"

"I don't care how worried he is!" Lie. "What Jake does doesn't matter to me!" Lie. "It's not like my life concerns him in the least!" LIE.

"If only you knew. Call Jake. Now." Then she hung up. My own mother hung up on me! And I was being childish. I sighed. Should I really call him? I didn't even have to ask the question before I knew the answer. Time to swallow my pride. Slowly, I dialed the number that I've had memorized since I was old enough to pick up a phone. I listened to the slow, agonizing ring of the phone before Jake finally picked the phone up.

"Hello?" Jake sounded tired, like he'd been up three days straight. I hung up. I was a complete coward, but I couldn't talk to him. But I had to. He'd think Alice kidnapped me and stuffed me into a phone-less room. Because the normal me would've already picked up a phone and talked to Jake until 5 am. The normal me might've even demanded that Jake get on the next plane to New York and joined us, most likely against Alice's wishes. So, I had to do this.

Once more, I picked up the phone, dialed Jake's number, and listened to the agonizingly slow ringing. _I couldn't do this._ I had to. _But it was so hard._** I have to do this for Jake**. That shut all other thoughts up. Even if I'd have to face the embarrassment of admitting that I thought and really wanted Jake to kiss me earlier today, it was worth it to make Jake feel better. Finally, Jake picked up.

"Hello?" His voice sounded more annoyed than last time. Silence. I couldn't make myself speak. I was the ass. Not Jake.

"Hello?" Jake said again.

I forced my self to speak. To say anything. I knew that Jake hadn't been thinking of me that way today, and that just made things harder. Please Heart, stop torturing me so much.

"I swear if this is another prank call I'll-" I finally managed to choke words out.

"Hey, Jake…"


	2. Conversations I Rather Wouldn't Have Had

**Author's Note: I'm so hyped! Sorry I haven't updated in FOREVER. I'm going to try to get a chapter written every 2 weeks in the very least. Thanks for all the positive feedback, but I need more! Feel free to comment on anything when you're done reading. Hope you enjoy!**

***DISCLAIMER***

**Me: Jake! You belong to me!**

**Jake: Um-**

**Nessie: No, Jake belongs to me!**

**Jake: *awkward* Sorry, I belong to Stephanie Meyer.**

**Me: WHY?**

**Sorry to say it, but it's true. All characters- even Jake- belong to Stephanie Meyer. I know. It sucks.**

Light filtered in through the windows. I'd only gotten a few a hours of sleep the night before. I spent most of the night having a long, uncomfortable chat with Jacob. If I had been expecting Jacob thoroughly chewing me out, I was totally wrong. Jake was, for once in his life, extremely quiet. He asked how I was, if I had eaten, and where I was staying. Then, for about five minutes, both ends of the line were completely silent. After that, we awkwardly attempted small talk and then hung up. That was it. I spent who-knows-how-long staring at the phone wondering exactly what the hell had happened. Then I watched TV for and hour and finally went to sleep.

I dreamt about the weirdest things. Jake was a black lab and the rest of his pack were various dogs. Mom, Dad, Rosalie, Emmet, Jasper, Alice, Carlisle, and even the sweet Esme were bats. The dogs and the bats lived forever. Charlie, Sue, and Billy were still humans. They were mortal. I was an outcast. I was human with grotesque bat wings shooting out of my back. I lived forever, but fit in nowhere. So, all the humans made me cover up my wings and stay with them. I guess it was supposed to be an act of kindness. I watched as the bats flew away. I still had my Jacob, though. But Jake didn't know who I was. The black lab was looking for bats, and to him I was an ordinary girl. I was nobody. I watched as my dog and his pack ran towards the bats. Eventually, the humans all died and I was alone. I mean, what kind of a dream is _that_? I'm seriously starting to question whether or not I'm mentally disturbed.

"Finally, you're up! Are you ready for some shopping?" Alice asked.

"I don't think so, Alice. I'll stay here for a bit. Buy me something nice?"

"Always do. Call me if you decide to go anywhere, and warn ahead of time when the dog comes."

"Jacob's not coming…" I whispered.

"I've decided. God exists and loves all good vampires. He's giving me a blessing. Do you know how much fun the dog is to shop with? None at all, that's how much." Alice smiled and started to walk out the door. At the last moment, she turned around and asked, "Is something wrong between the two of you?"

"Apparently everything is." I muttered. Alice came and sat beside me on the bed.

"Okay, spill." I sat up and began my rant.

"So, it's like I'm not even a girl to him! I mean, he does see me as a girl, but not in the way I want him to! I'm only technically five and a half! I'm older than that in more ways than one! Can't he ever see that I don't want to play with dolls anymore? I want to have my first kiss and go on dates! I want Jake to be…" I trailed off.

"Want Jake to be what? Your boyfriend? Things happen. That's possible. And as far as kissing, Jake's good at stealing kisses." Alice said easily, but her face became horrified mere seconds after finishing.

"Good at stealing kisses? What?" Omigod. What if Jake was secretly a womanizer? I don't think I can handle that.

"Did Jake ever tell you that he had a crush on your mother?" Where was she going with this?

"Um, yeah. He's over her now, though… RIGHT?" Oh, God. Jake wasn't interested in me because he still likes my MOTHER?

"No! I mean, yes, Jake's over your mom. The thing is, when he still liked her, he kind of, you know…" Oh. _OH_.

"Jake kissed my mom?" Alice nodded, and I sat back in shock. "Jake's kissed my mom once before?"

"Twice, actually." Alice added.

"Gee, thanks for telling me."

"Sorry." Alice mumbled. Then, all at once, Alice shot of the bed and paced around the room in a rampage.

"I hate this! I never know what to say when I talk to you, Ness. You blind me. I always end up hurting your feelings on accident because _I can't see_."

"Sorry that I'm an inconvenience." I murmured.

"Oh, Ness. I didn't mean it like that-"

"I know. Nobody ever does. I think I'm gonna go for a walk." I slowly walked to the door. Alice didn't try to speak or anything. Didn't even make a sound.

I walked around, lost in thought. When a vampire can't think of anything to say, that's a pretty bad sign. The mind of a vampire is incomparable to any other creature on Earth. We never forget anything and can easily access our vampire memories. Unlike humans, we can effectively think of several things at once. This makes us faster to respond to any situation. So if someone who can normally respond to a troubling situation immediately can't answer you, the scenario must be dire. Maybe I should-

"Hey? Whatcha doin'?" I looked up. Three guys were surrounding me. Apparently I had walked into an alley without realizing.

"Oh, um, sorry. I spaced." I moved to leave, but one guy blocked the exit.

"Why don't ya come back to Earth with us. We're a lot of fun." One guy said, edging closer. What's going on?

"I think I'll stay among the stars, but thanks for the invite." They laughed. I don't know if it was with me or at me.

"Don't be so mean." The guy who talked earlier edged closer. I had a feeling he was the ringleader of this group.

"I'm not being mean. Look I have to get back home-"

"Why're you still in your pajamas? Is it bedtime?" Ringleader said, edging even closer. "You wanna have a little sleepover with us?" **Oh**. That's what they're doing. They are so going down.

"I think it is bedtime, but I need a sleeping buddy. So I won't feel so _lonely_, you know?" I said seductively, motioning for Ringleader to come closer. He sauntered forward cockily, but I could see hypnotized look in his eyes. Vampires tend to do that to humans. Even hybrid freaks like me.

When he got close enough, I reached out and slid my finger along his jawline and fit my hand to the shape of his cheek. Then the screaming began.

I walked out of the alley satisfied, listening to the humans whimper. I didn't do any physical harm to them, because I don't believe in harming someone so much weaker than myself. Let's just say, I showed them things collectively more disturbing than most see in a lifetime. I went to the nearest store and bought a dress to change into. I thanked God that I hadn't chosen anything particularly sexy to wear to bed. Although, those pajamas did look really good on me. Everything does. It's part of the vamp-amp package. It increases your strength, attractiveness, brain power, and, sadly enough, bloodlust. It also takes away any chance of aging or, if you're a girl, having children. Ever. That might sound appealing, besides the bloodlust, to 20-something year-old girls who don't want to worry about birth control, but becoming vampire is a big deal. It takes away your humanity and forces something upon you that you don't want. The need to kill. On that happy note, being a vamp isn't too bad. After a while.

I walked around for a bit, but then a flyer flew my way. I analyzed it for a second, then ran in the direction of the store being advertised. An hour later, I left the store, mood soaring. Later, I unlocked the door to the suite where Alice and I were staying. She was still sitting, waiting. That is, until she saw my latest purchase.

"What're you doing with _that_? Ness, you know they aren't gonna like it. What're you planning on-"

"Alice? Let's go home."

**A/N: Okay, this is a little shorter than the last chapter and, actually, a little odd. I liked where I left off, and I hope you still enjoyed it and will give me lots and lots of good feedback. Please and thank you!**

**P.S. Are you wondering what the mystery purchase is? MUWAHAHAHA!**


	3. The Purchase

**A/N: Hey, it's me! (Who else would it be?) I hope you're enjoying the story thus far, cause I'm having a lot of fun writing it! Are you eager to find out about the mystery purchase? Stay tuned, and you'll find out! ~ (TV Show Imitation)**

***DISCLAIMER***

**Me: Okay, I think we can work this out!**

**Stephanie Meyer: Work what out?**

**Me: All the characters except Jake will belong to you. Everything else belongs to me. (Everything else being Jake)**

**Stephanie Meyer: Sorry, I don't think I can do that.**

**Me:WHY?**

** Yes, it's true. All characters, even Jake, belong to Stephanie Meyer (At least until she stops being so stubborn about letting me have him)**

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Alice had apparently seen the absence of herself in New York and figured we'd be leaving early. So, she had ordered plane tickets for today. Let me tell you, sneaking my purchase onto the plane was no easy feat.

"Ma'am? Can I check your bags please?" A young man asked.

"Oh, um, sure." I said, slipping my purchase into my huge peacoat before he'd notice.

"Excuse me, ma'am. You'll need to take off your jacket, too." How was I supposed to do this? Then I knew. I'd been practicing the technique for months. To use my "talent" without contact.

I stood and imagined myself walking through the airport with no sign of my purchase. That's what everyone around me saw. A pretty girl walking to her terminal. It wasn't hard to start using my technique, but it was hard to maintain it. Mom once compared shielding large areas to stretching a rubber band. It was the exact opposite for me. I felt like I was being compressed. I had to focus entirely on one mental image. If I messed up and let some other thought slip through, it was all over.

I'd made it to the plane, and _just_ when I thought I could just relax, my purchase started moving around in the bag I'd slipped it back into earlier. It was apparently going to be a long plane ride home.

Just when we walked through the door, and I felt that it'd all been worth it, I was greeted with-

"What's _that_?"

"Rosalie, calm down." I pleaded.

"No, I will not. We already have one of those and I do not want another!" Everybody else in the house got a little closer.

"Did you want a snack or something, Ness?" Emmet asked sarcastically.

"NO! How could you think that?" I yelled, clutching my purchase to my chest.

"Well, I don't know, we're vegetarian vampires and that's-"

"No, no, NO!" I screamed frantically.

"Ness, please be reasonable. You can't bring a dog into this kind of a household." My mom reasoned. That's right. If you hadn't guessed already, my "purchase" was a dog. A white Japanese Akita puppy, to be exact. You see, the flyer that had flown into my face was one to a pet store. And when I walked into the store, my eyes immediately locked onto her. Jacob was no longer "the one" because at that moment, it became this precious puppy. Okay, that's a total over-exaggeration, but this little pup was "the one" in her own way. So, I couldn't let them win.

"Mom, haven't you even wanted something so badly, even when everybody told you not to?" I asked, proceeding to give her the puppy dog eyes.

"No fair, Ness. No fair. I still don't think we should have a dog in this house. Not only for Rosalie's sanity, but the puppy's welfare, too."

"Fine, then. I'll take my puppy to someone who can actually appreciate and love her." Then, I stormed out. That doesn't quite explain how I found myself here, at Jacob's front door, though. I swear, I was about to turn around and go to Charlie's, but the door opened. Jacob stood there, staring at me. Then, he turned to stare at the dog.

"You bought a dog in New York, snuck it onto a plane, then proceeded to bring it home to Rosalie, who's head practically exploded when she saw it. You debated with your mom, but in the end, she convinced you not to keep it in the house. So, here you are, trying to convince me, a werewolf, to keep the dog in _my_ house. Did I miss anything?"

"Emmet joked about it being a snack."

"Oh, of course," Jake sighed. He looked at me, my puppy, then back again. "Alright, come inside." I followed him in and waited while he went to get something to eat. My puppy was asleep in my arms. She was so adorable. Jake walked in with a box of day-old pizza and two cans of Pepsi. I honestly don't know how those survived.

"So, does it have a name?" Jake asked.

"Not yet. Wanna look one up?"

"Sure." And so, we spent the next hour trying to find the perfect name, but nothing fit quite right. Then we found it.

"Ayame: A female wolf; Demon princess." I read off the computer screen. Jake and I looked at each other, then the little puppy in my arms.

"Are you sure she can work a name meaning "Demon Princess", Ness?"

"Totally. Ayame… Wake up." My puppy's eyes drifted open. I practically died of over-exposure to pure cuteness.

"Do you like that name, Aya?" The puppy yawned an nestled into my arms. SO. CUTE.

"Aya?" Billy asked, wheeling over to inspect the dog.

"It's her nickname. Rhymes with Maya."

"We just named her and she already has a nickname?" Jake groaned. I quieted him with a glance.

"She's adorable." Billy said.

"I know, right?" I glowed.

"You look like a proud parent who's just been told that their child's a prodigy." Jake said.

"Aya is a prodigy. Aren't you, Aya?"

"What's her amazing talent?"

"Being cute, of course."

I ended up spending the night at Billy's because I didn't want to part with my beloved. Before you ask, I'm referring to Aya, not Jake. Although… Just kidding. I stayed 100% for Aya. Alright, 75% for Aya. I've been a sucker for sleep-overs with Jake since I was physically three. The fact that I was now physically seventeen wouldn't change that. I gathered up blankets the way I used to and made a huge bed on the floor. Jake slept on the left, and I slept on the right. Exactly the way we used to. I lied flat on my back while Jake slept on his right side. Exactly the way we used to. Jake's left and clasped mine. Must I say it? In all of this, there was one thing different. One thing that went against tradition. That was the puppy, huddled up in a ball, resting between Jake and me. She was so cute. She was ours.

Jake fell asleep quickly, his face so calm, so peaceful. I don't know how he did it. My whole body was on a wire. Electricity coursed through me, starting at my left hand and spreading everywhere else. I was glad my mental wall was up, or else Jake would be feeling this too, because our hands were clasped together so tightly. Then he'd know. He'd know I loved him. That I was in love with him. I stared up at the ceiling, wondering exactly who came up with the idea for this thrilling, confusing, wonderful, heart-breaking feeling. But, along with the happiness came pain. Imprinting.

In Jake's tribe, imprinting was basically love at first sight. Or, rather, love at first sight after becoming a werewolf. That's sort of a mouthful, though. I don't think Jake has imprinted, yet. I'm trying to prepare myself for when does happen. I heard that it's like gravity doesn't hold you in place, the one you imprint on does. Jake probably won't spent a third of the time he spends with me now after imprinting. The thought of that nearly scares me to death, and I'm immortal. Or, at least, Carlisle seems to think I am.

I looked at Jake again. Reality soon became fantasy. Instead of lying on a pile of blankets on the floor, we were resting in a beige canopy bed. Wedding rings rested on the left fingers of our clasped hands. The cute puppy resting between us became an adorable little baby…

Jake's eyes flashed open. Alarm was written on his face.

"Ness?" Jake said loudly. What's going on? Why's Jake-

In less than half a second, I was flattened against the wall on the opposite side of the room. Jake and I watched each other, wide-eyed. I don't know who was more surprised about Jake seeing my little fantasy. Me, who never thought he'd even be able to see it if he tried, or Jake, who didn't have any idea that I fantasized about stuff like that in the first place. How did my walls come down? Then it hit me.

I was physically seven. It was raining, and Jake was out of town. I was bored. Mom decided to give me some educational entertainment.

"Hey Nessie! Do you wanna learn something today?"

"Sure, Mom! What're we learning?"

"You're the one learning. I'm the teacher today." Mom had said. I'd cocked my head to the side.

"I thought Daddy was the teacher because he's so smart." Mom had fumed.

"Are you calling me stupid? Come on. Today, I'll teach you something you'll thank God for in the future."

"What are you going to teach me?"

"How to block people out."

"Why would I wanna do that?"

"If you're going to socialize with humans, you'll need to know how to touch them without letting them know what you're thinking. Normal people can't do what you can do, Ness. Besides, one day you'll want to hold Jake's hand without letting him know what you're thinking."

"Why would I wanna do that? I tell my Jacob everything I'm thinking." I said. Mom looked me in the eye very seriously.

"There will come a day when you will feel a certain way about Jake. You won't want Jake to find out that you feel that way by accident. You'll want to tell him yourself. Do you understand?"

"Not really. I'll remember what you just said though."

"Good girl. The lesson will start now." After two hours of intense focus, I had mastered the technique. I couldn't shut Dad out of my thoughts. No one could, except for Mom. However, I learned how to stop projecting my thoughts onto anyone who touched my hand. Mom gave me a warning, though.

"Nessie, you still need to be careful. Even if you practice this technique every day, if you have a visual combined with a really strong emotion, your wall will break down. Be careful what you think about when you're holding hands with Jake, okay?"

"Sure, Mom."

I returned to now. It was so silent that you could hear a needle drop.

"Nessie, what-" Before Jake got a chance to finish, I ran as fast as I could out of the house. I didn't even grab my clothes. I just ran outside in my huge nightshirt. Very smooth. I practically ripped the car door off while trying to open it.

"Nessie!" Jake called, running outside. I fumbled around for keys, only to realize that I left them in the house.

"Nessie!" I freaked out when I heard his voice getting closer. I panicked and hot-wired the car the way Rosalie taught me. In mere seconds I was out of the driveway and speeding towards the big glass house.

I ran inside crying. Everyone was downstairs in the blink of an eye, asking me what was wrong and trying to console me. I continued to sob, my chest hurting with each breath.

"Did the dog do this? I swear he-"

"No! It's my fault." I hiccuped, grabbing Dad's sleeve.

"Honey, what happened?" Mom asked. I shook my head back and forth.

"It's too embarrassing."

"How about you think about what happened and I'll everyone else?" Dad asked, concerned. It wasn't exactly a great option, but it beat telling everyone myself. I ran over what happened, trying to put as little emphasis as possible on my marital fantasy. Dad still cringed when he saw it, though.

"Okay, this is what happened…" Dad began. I tuned out and closed my eyes, afraid of everybody's reaction.

"It's okay, Ness." Alice said. I gave her a skeptical look. "Don't look at me like that. I know what it's like to love a man who knows exactly what you're feeling. Regardless of whether you want him to or not."

"But, Alice, you can see the future. You knew everything was going to be okay."

"I know what you're going through." Rosalie piped in. I raised an eyebrow.

"I know exactly how it feels to fall in love with a guy who's incredibly clueless and has more muscles than brains."

"Hey!" Emmet exclaimed, only partially offended.

"Sorry, babe. You know it's true."

"Emmet was obviously in love with you, though." I told Rosalie. "I don't think anybody's got it worse than me."

"How about imprinting on the daughter of the girl you thought you were in love with and the bloodsucker who stole her away?" Everyone in the room turned to look at Jake.

"What…" I trailed off. I couldn't make sense of his words. Imprinting… on _me_?

Jake walked up to me, very slowly and deliberately. He stared into my eyes and leaned in until his face was a mere inch away from mine.

"I love you, Renesmee." Jake murmured.

There are many things I could've done at that moment. I could've slapped him for not telling me sooner, or reached up and kissed him, or started bawling out of pure, unadulterated happiness. Maybe a combination of all three. Instead, I did something that I had no knowledge of any vampire ever having done before: I took a step back, and feinted.

* * *

**A/N: Ha ha! I finally get to end a chapter with somebody unconscious. I am now complete. Please review and give me opinions for the next chapter! I really love all of the feedback I'm getting. Thank you to all of my lovely readers! :)**


	4. Sleep and Other Forms of Unconsciousness

** A/N: Hello, my pretties! I hope you don't hate me too much for prolonging this chapter. I know how fans get- I'm a fan of some other fanfics, so I've been fearing for my life. But, I've been very busy lately. So there's my lame-o excuse. If you wanna see pictures of Ayame, you can go on my profile page to click on one of my links. I wanna give a shout-out to all of my loyal readers, I love you all. You are why I write, as cheesy as that may sound. Hearts and smiley faces to all my reviewers. You guys are awesome. Anyways, please enjoy this chapter.**

**DISCLAIMER:**

**Me : How about I trade you Ayame for Jake? *Ayame whines***

**S.M. : Ayame's adorable, but I can't give Jake up.**

**Me : WHY?**

**Must I say it? EVERYTHING BELONGS TO STEPHANIE MEYER. Except Ayame. Thank God for Ayame.**

. . . "I've never seen anyone feint outside of movies."

"I hadn't either, but then Bella came along. I remember this one time when-"

"Edward!"

"Hey, you guys. I think she's waking up."

Slowly, I opened my eyes and looked up at the faces hovering over me. There was Emmet and Dad and Mom and Carlisle and Esme. Apparently Jasper, Alice, and Rosalie were out. Everybody was sitting on the end of my bed while I was laying down in the huge pile of fluffy pillows at the top. I was about to make some sort of sarcastic remark when Jacob came into view. Jacob. In the throng of pale, concerned faces, his dark, gorgeous, irresistibly sexy features made my heart race. I was so breath-taken by Jacob. The mere sight of him made me want to-

My dad started coughing in a very, loud, uncontrollable- and rather annoying- manner. I realized that he'd heard my thoughts and turned a particularly deep shade of red. I slammed my face into a huge pillow on my left and turned away from everyone.

"Can you all leave so I can die in peace?"

"Don't be like that, Ness." Emmet said, nudging my arm. "I'm sure every girl has feinted after a love confession some time in her life." If possible, I turned an even deeper shade of red. I screamed into my pillow and Emmet laughed like it was the funniest thing ever.

"Hey, let's leave Nessie and Jacob alone to talk for a bit." Esme suggested. My dear, sweet Esme. She, Mom, and Carlisle hustled Dad and Emmet out of my room and closed the door. I waited for their footsteps to get far enough away before pulling the pillow away from my face and staring into Jake's eyes.

I focused on the color of Jake's irises. it was like melted chocolate. An endless pool of melted chocolate. Just looking at his eyes left a sweet taste on my tongue. I leaned in closer, and soon I could also smell his rich, mouth-watering scent. It was a perfect sensation. At this moment, I could only think of one thing more perfect. My eyes zeroed in on Jacob's lips, and I leaned in even closer.

"Um, Nessie, don't you wanna talk before we, um-"

"No." I interrupted, leaning in closer. It was similar to the feeling of being drunk- I had first experienced intoxication at a Christmas party last year when I was curious and left alone with a bottle of champagne. Everything was hazy and my heart was beating really fast. I was exhaling very heavily for no apparent reason. My train of thought was completely random. _Wow, my mattress is really comfortable. Jake has really big hands. It's been a while since Jake last got a haircut, hasn't it? Jake's eyelashes are so dark and thick. I never really noticed, but Jake's lips are really soft and pink. I wondered how they'd feel-_

A loud CRASH downstairs made me jump 10 feet in the air. I suddenly snapped back to reality, noticing the crimson Jacob in front of me and how close our faces were. I also noticed that my chest was pressed against his in a manner that wasn't very polite. I flushed and moved back to the opposite end of my bed.

"Um-"

"What's going on in here?" My dad barged in.

"Nothing, I-" Jake stuttered.

"Alright, mutt. I think it's time we have a talk." And with that, my dad dragged Jacob out of my room. Fantastic.

It had been 3 hours since Dad forced Jake out before I realized something. I didn't think it was just my overwhelming love for Jake that I was acting so weird earlier. There was something else. So I did what anyone would do. I talked to Carlisle. After a bunch of difficult and, to be honest, weird tests, we finally found some results. However to say I didn't care for them would've been the biggest understatement of all time.

"Renesmee, I found some answers as to why your behavior was as such around Jacob." Carlisle had started.

"Really? That's great!" Then I read the slightly laughing look on his face and began to think otherwise.

"You know how you grow at an accelerated speed, Renesmee?"

"Yeah..."

"To put it bluntly, so are your hormones." Carlisle announced. I heard Dad and Emmet cracking up in the next room. Apparently they'd been listening to Carlisle and my's conversation. This only added to the redness in my cheeks.

"So, I'm suffering from a hormone imbalance?" I managed to choke out.

"Yes, a very severe hormone imbalance. To be honest you're currently more hormonal than a pregnant human woman." Carlisle said. Dad and Emmet just lost it. I groaned in frustration.

"How long will this last?" I asked, anxious.

"I may have to run some more tests to get a more precise estimate, but I'm guessing about 2 to 3 months."

"Are you serious? How am I supposed to deal with this for 2 to 3 months?" I yelled.

"Be rational." Carlisle pleaded.

"How can I? I'm as hormonal as a pregnant woman, remember? Teen hormones is the very definition of being irrational!" I practically screamed, and with that, I stomped up to my room and slammed my door.

It's been a week since the whole Jake fiasco, and I've been avoiding him since. I haven't even been able to call him because his voice alone makes my vision go hazy if I listen to it long enough. Especially after he's been sleeping. And since he sleeps two thirds of the time, it's very likely to wake him with a phone call. Jake wasn't freaking out because Carlisle made up some health-related excuse for why he couldn't see me. I just made sure he didn't say the words "hormones" or "sexual". Ugh. Life sucks- no pun intended. I finally get the boy of my dreams to say he likes me and I can't see him because I'm in super H-mode. H-mode being hormone-mode, of course. Everything is so unfair. "Nessie! Can you come down for second?" My mom yelled from downstairs. Not like she needed to yell. I would've heard her if she whispered. I stomped downstairs, making a point of being slow by going human-speed.

"What?"

"After a few more tests we've come to a conclusion about your inclining hormonal imbalance." Carlisle started.

"And?" I prodded.

"Your raging hormones-," Dad and Emmet giggled like school girls. "-will increase until you reach a maximum threshold. After that it will reach a breaking point, then escalate back down to normal. Think of it like the plot of a book." Carlisle said.

Emmet was laughing like crazy for a reason that was soon revealed.

"You can also think of it like when you-" Emmet was soon cut off by being tackled by Dad, but I got the gist of it.

"I'm gonna go see Jake." I announced, annoyed. I got up and started leaving the room.

"Be careful with Jake until you reach the climax!" Emmet yelled out. Dad only strangled the laughing Emmet even more. I distantly heard Emmet ask, "What? Books have climaxes. What I said was completely innocent!" as I scurried out of the room, to my car.

The ride to Jake's place was fairly troublesome. The traffic was terrible, there were several red lights, and some 50-something biker guys tried hitting on me. Ew. Finally, I had arrived. I was at my only salvation in all my supernatural drama. Jake's house. You see, even though Jake stayed at Billy's a lot, like the night I stayed over, Jake had his own place. He wasn't too emotionally attached to it, but I loved the place. It was my home away from home. I loved it's old brick walls, it's White windows, it's simplicity, it's cement driveway, and the red-painted door that I'd made so many Elizabeth Arden Jokes about. This place was perfect. I parked my car, knowing Jake could hear me from inside if he was home. I marched up the driveway and entered without knocking. Upon walking through the Elizabeth Arden-door, I realized Jake wasn't home. His scent washed over the entire house, but it wasn't as thick as it'd be if he was home. I went up to his room to wait for him. _What if he isn't home until tomorrow?_, my internal voice asked. My eyebrows pulled together in determination. If he wasn't home until tomorrow, that's exactly how long I'd wait. As I entered his room, the smell of his night shirt emanated from a corner of the room. He must have just pulled it off and left. Without thinking about it, my feet led me to it. My hands reached to pick it up, beyond my control. I then stumbled over to the bed, and sat down with the shirt pressed to my face. It smelled strongly of Jacob. Sugar, spice, everything nice, and all that.

I must've fallen asleep, because I found myself experiencing one of those dreams you know isn't real, but can't wake up from. Images of pretty flowers swirled into each other, and the smell of vanilla danced across the air. I faintly heard Jacob's voice telling me what each and every flower was. Lily, daisy, petunia, lilac, orchid, peony, azalea, dahlia, zinnia, lotus, pansy, marigold, and many others. It reminded me of the day Jacob took me to a two-story flower shop because I wanted to see something pretty. He told me the names of every flower we saw, even if that meant we had to look them up. We must've been there for hours, but time flew by like minutes. Because of my special learning ability, I retained all of the knowledge given to me. So now when somebody asks what a flower is called, I remember it in an instant. When they asks how I know, I smile and say it's a secret. In my dream, an exotic flower I'd never seen before appeared. _Renesmee,_ Jacob's voice whispered. _It's called-_

"Renesmee? Renesmee?" Jacob asked, shaking me. I slowly let my eyelids drift open. Jake and all his gloriousness (is that a word?) stood before me.

"Hey Jake." I mumbled sleepily. I looked up to see him smiling at me.

"Hey, Nessie? What were you going to do last time I saw you?" Jake asked flirtatiously. I blushed and attempted to stutter something. Jake shut me up by covering my mouth with his.

My entire body trembled. Liquid fire coursed through my veins, and I kissed him like there was no tomorrow. His hands slid into my hair, and I held onto his shirt. I wasn't sleepy at all now. One hand slid out of my hair and down my back, slipping under my shirt and reaching up to play with my bra strap. I gasped at the feel of his skin on mine.

"Jake, we can't." I murmured. He undid my bra. His mouth left mine, and he started kissing my neck, to my collar bone, to my. . .

"Jake, we can't." I whispered desperately.

"Can't what?" Jake asked. The sensation of his hands and lips were gone and sitting all the way across the bed. I jolted forward. My hair was only messed up from lying down, my lips were glossy and un-kissed, and my bra strap was fully intact. It had all been a dream. Damn it.

"Can't what?" Jake repeated. He leaned closer, getting in my face. In a good way. I blushed furiously.

"Nothing. You want me to make you some food?" That shut him up temporarily, but the fire was later re-lit.

"Can't what, Ness?" Jake prodded, smirking.

"Nothing." And so it went. Life sucks. Dreams suck. Especially if you only get to wake up to a reality in which they seem like impossible fantasies.

However, as I look at Jacob, I feel a lightening in my chest. I guess dreams aren't too bad. They give you hope. A hope that makes it seem like anything is possible. Dreams are nice. But they still suck.

**A/N: LOL. Were you getting excited? I love crushing you and Renesmee's dreams. I might be nice and fulfill them some day, though. But not right now. MWAHAHAHAHA! Thank you to all of my fans and supporters, even the ones who wanted to kill me for not posting within 3 months. XD Love you all. :)**


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